Does Your Spouse Ever Embarrass You?

We both lead a semi-independent kind of lifestyle. Meaning we each mostly do our own thing and don’t go places together that often. It got established that way due to my husband’s intense work schedule: as a business owner he usually works without days off. The selfless devotion he developed for his business affects many aspects of his daily life. For example it takes a toll on how he talks to people outside work. Like he is the boss.

Yesterday all three of us happened to be in one place together (and I’m not talking about the house): my son’s new dance school. After the class my husband walked up to the dance teacher to “introduce himself”. Here’s a replay of the conversation that happened:

Husband: Hello, my name is… I am the father of… we chose your school…. Blah-blah-blah

Teacher: Nice to meet you!

Husband: How is my son doing? How is his progress?

Teacher: He is doing….

Husband: He’s been training with another teacher for two years, competing in the contests, dancing with this girl… (details… more details…)

Teacher: We also do contests: regional and …

Husband: Very good. This is so good. Let’s see how it goes. This is all hard labor. (a tirade of meaningless compliments goes on…)

Teacher (finally manages to say a full sentence): Do you want to keep the old partner or find a new one?

Husband: Not sure yet, first he needs to improve his dancing. We rely on you, who you will recommend, some talented girl.

Teacher: I don’t usually interfere in the partner choice.

Husband (obviously not listening): So yeah, we’ll do as you say, if you recommend some girl, it will be nice, please find him someone.

I was so freaking embarrassed. What’s the point of asking questions if you don’t bother listen to answers?!? Why interrupt in mid-sentence? Why act like the teacher is reporting to you and you are the boss? I notice that people are frequently intimidated by him, and maybe it’s not always a bad thing, maybe the teacher will now give special attention to our son. But this kind of disrespectful treatment of people upsets me enormously, makes me feel ashamed and somewhat responsible, like parents feel responsible for the mischievous acts conducted by their kids. Should I feel bad about his lack of manners? Does it show that I tolerate this kind of rude behavior, consider it normal? (I don’t by the way, I insist on him talking politely to me when he forgets himself occasionally. He is also a pretty good listener at home.)

Does your spouse ever embarrass you in public and make you suddenly feel, even just for a moment, surprised that this is the person you are living with?